Adventures in GTA Online


I love GTA Online. It’s a real fun place to just have fun with few rules. Here are some adventures I’ve had in the 8 or so months since it launched, and some tips too:


Snow Day

Christmas Morning I booted up GTA Online to find it covered in snow. I thought it looked pretty nice and so I just decided to drive around on the bike to see what the map looked like. I come across a random guy, the only person on the server, and he’s low level so I don’t worry. I park up beside him and he jumps on my bike. We go up one of the mountains and he glitches the game giving me a few billion dollars. I think “oh that’s nice!”, bank the money, kick him off the bike in the middle of the mountain, speed down it and buy everything I ever wanted upon reaching the main road below. THE END


On Being A Cop

I usually mute the mic chat because it’s inane and scares me. After killing a few randoms I found out that they weren’t the usual European clientele, but Americans! So I decide to unmute as I flew around in my Buzzard helicopter. There’s a guy. He’s trying to get a girl to add him as a friend on PSN. I think that’s a little silly given how forceful he’s being so I head over. On the way things escalate to “give me your phone number or I’ll keep shooting you”. Oddly she’s going through with it all and she sounds nervous in doing so. I first reported him for griefing and then continued to kill him on a beach on the east coast. He doesn’t like me doing this but the girl manages to get away.

Final tally was 14 kills to me, none to him.

Another time there was another American chap, sounded very gangster, who wanted a girl to drive around in his car (in game). She didn’t seem happy about it so he ran her over until he agreed. Once again I took to the Buzzard and blew him up. Final tally before he left: 8 kills to me, none to him.


Over the Hills

This one’s easy. Just get a bounty and go driving around the countryside. Try to keep near the train tracks because you can dive into tunnels if someone flies over. Recently I had two very rough sounding American folk chase me around the countryside. They were annoyed that I was good at dodging their attacks. My bounty was added to my money and I jumped into Passive mode. They didn’t like that and spent half an hour trying to drive a car up the hill to get me. The sun set and it was lovely.


Cars and Autoaiming

You can’t autoaim when in a car so how about this instead: if someone is chasing you or you’re ahead of someone else. Park up quickly beside a wall, preferably something below standing height. Pull out a good weapon and once they approach: shoot! I’ve never had this go wrong for me and it’s a great way of getting rid of chasers.

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